There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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