the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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