i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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