my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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