it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
soo... how was my night?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize