i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize