oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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