We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize