and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
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