i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize