Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
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