I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize