Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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