Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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