I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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