I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize