I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize