Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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