Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize