Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize