whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize