1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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