alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
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