Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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