how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize