You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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