Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
What did we do last night that was yellow?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
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