so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
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