these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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