I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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