I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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