She's like a pop up book from hell.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize