I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
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He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
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Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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