if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
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Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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