I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I use my feet as sexual weapons
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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