Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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