I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize