if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
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