I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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