Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize