then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
He kissed a someone with a penis
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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