It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
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