So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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