R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize