you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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