I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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