You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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