It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize