Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
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Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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