So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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